Journal Entry - 01/08/07 (Grant Ave Spaghetti Kitchen and DENUM)
HC395 Service Learning Trip

Today we made two visits - one to a homeless shelter and service provider called DENUM (Denver Urban Ministries), the other to a spaghetti kitchen at 16th Street and Grant Ave.

DENUM
The most meaningful part of the first visit was a board game similar to Parker Bro's "Game of Life". We each were assigned to pairs representing a profile of a real family or individual from the center's database of homeless or working poor - with names/identities changed to maintain confidentiality.

Our goal was to survive a month of living in Denver without having to live on the streets. Our income and expenses were determined by:

• The parameters of our assets and expenses, such as paycheck, rent, etc. as defined on our profile.
• Regular expenses that appeared on each day of the month - such as rent, weekly groceries, laundry, etc
• Chance/surprise/gifts/or expenses drawn from Hope, Life, and School cards that randomly were drawn on a given day. It was possible to receive "assistance" with the expenses, regular and surprise, from DENUM and other agencies, but (just like in real life), sometimes the grants or aid was depleted or just gone and so was not available to us.

What shocked me the most about this experience was the cruel/cold "mental or moral calculus" that is inevitably applied - How much of the grocery bill to pay this week? Guess we can't buy the kids Christmas presents this year - their lice bill wiped out that part of the budget. I also saw social capital principles being applied here - neighbors would loan money to each other, or watch each other's kids to help pay the bills by reducing the needs for daycare services.

What hit me the hardest was:

1. The immoral/unethical reality of people living this way - both in Denver & Missoula, and and elsewhere.
2. How easy it was to enter this state of being - one missed rent payment, a broken refrigerator, loss of energy assistance, the loss of a spouse, are just a few examples.
3. How likely it would be for me to become this way if I moved out into Missoula, and and didn't have a family or other support network to fall back on.

Spaghetti Kitchen
The other visit was to a spaghetti kitchen where we assisted in serving lunch and dinner for approximately 450 people in four hours.

I was struck by many things during this visit:

1. The hard work required for volunteer work - I probably opened 100 cans of peas, corn, beef hash, green beans, tomato paste, etc. in various sizes and shapes (some were crunched and deformed) as my task, although in retrospect, it was a lot easier than some of my other classmates' jobs - dish washing, busing dishes, or serving.
2. The incredible flexibility, energy, and diversity of the volunteer and paid staff in the kitchen. I talked with a telecommunications marketing vice president, chemical engineer with a Ph.D, children's book writer, food service salesman, just to name a few, and watched as the volunteers (including myself) poured in and out of the kitchen, constantly shifting gears to help where they were needed.
3. The sense of dignity, respect, and community that I perceived from the people coming to eat.

Even from my spot in the kitchen, I heard tons of compliments, "please" and "thank you", "God bless", and "Mam" spoken to the servers. Later, when I went to eat, I sat at one of the tables, across from a disabled couple, although I didn't realize that they were disabled for a while. As I watched the care, respect, and trust they had for each other, even though their handicaps were significant, I got a very warm, romantic, but sad feeling in my heart for their struggle, but smiled at how they dealt with their situation.

Finally, when I was cleaning up, I overheard several conversations between diners, where information, tips, advice, and encouragement were exchanged. Even though they were often low on resources, and sometimes struggling to survive, they more truly embodied the principles of citizenship at times than I did. Moreover, given their circumstances, they probably would have been forgiven if they looked out for their own interests first...and they still helped each other!

today, more than any other day thus far in my life, I have been shocked, humbled, scared, and shamed at some of my previous thoughts, attitudes, and perceptions. The volunteer experiences was just incredible, and so much more fulfilling than anything else that I've done. It made me proud to be a citizen.